Lowered Self Esteem – The first thing that comes to mind when talking about confidence is someone with their arms crossed over their chest exhibiting some form of swagger or bravado and isn’t afraid of anything or anyone. But this isn’t necessarily the case. Confidence can be subtle. It’s just a natural expression of ability, expertise, and self-regard. There are so many things that confident people are known to do, but have you ever asked or wondered what they don’t do? If you’re interested, below is a list of things they almost never do.
14 Things Lowered Self Esteem
1. They don’t get defensive when corrected
Defensiveness is just another way of dodging blame for something and trying to redirect it towards someone else. Confident people are open-minded about the mistakes they make and what they could have done better, and therefore they don’t place blame on anyone else. Confident people are well aware of their strengths and weaknesses and can listen to constructive criticism. When they make a mistake, they can comfortably acknowledge it, but they also stand up for themselves when they’re being blamed for something they didn’t do.
They seek criticism rather than avoid it. They are genuinely appreciative when someone chooses to help them learn and grow. When you’re comfortable with the person you are, you don’t need to defend your insecurities. People who are confident aren’t threatened by feedback, they rather see it as an opportunity to improve themselves. They acknowledge that they’re nowhere near perfect, but strive to become better versions of themselves.
2. They don’t try to please everyone
Confident people don’t seek validation from other people. They do what’s right to help others, but they don’t go out of their way to please everyone. On the other hand, people pleasers have low confidence in themselves since they feel their worth depends on the views of others. True confidence comes from within, not without. A confident person knows what they’re doing with their life and continues to pursue their dreams and goals. If you seem to have haters, take it as a sign that you’re doing something great with your life.
3. They don’t get too comfortable
Confident people know that getting too comfortable is the enemy of success. They can’t accomplish their goals because comfort results in complacency, which in turn leads to stagnation. Whenever they start feeling comfortable, they take it as a sign and once again begin pushing beyond their limits so they may continue to grow both as a professional and as an individual.
They are of the understanding that a little discomfort is a good thing. They constantly push themselves to do more and achieve more, and even ask for more responsibility. They don’t live in some bubble or let fear stop them from doing the things they need to do to evolve into the person they want to be. They actively pursue the feeling of discomfort because they know that stretching themselves is a must-have for them to achieve access.
4. They don’t talk more than they listen
Sometimes people talk a lot because they’re trying to prove themselves to those around them. But it’s those who are more confident that are less likely to have to prove themselves. They don’t try to have control of the conversation or try to steer it towards a certain direction because they’re okay with how things are going.
They put a lot of value in listening because it’s an opportunity to learn. They know that by actively listening and paying attention to others, they get to know things they didn’t know before. So instead of seeing interactions as opportunities to prove themselves, they focus on the interaction itself because they know it’s a far more enjoyable and productive approach to people.
5. They don’t think they have all the answers
Contrary to popular beliefs, confident people aren’t know-it-alls. They are very much willing to listen to the opinions and ideas of others. They don’t automatically believe that their ideas or values are the best. They know that O\other people have a lot to offer as well. Confident people are open-minded, and they try to see things from different perspectives. They don’t see things as just being black and white.
They think in shades of grey. They welcome every and all opinions and suggestions from those around them. It’s not only what they think that matters. The views of others matter too. Even with their abundance of confidence, they know that they don’t know everything.
6. They don’t seek attention
A lot of people are turned off by those who are desperate for any morsel of attention. Every chance they get they want to be noticed for one thing or the other. Confident people know that being yourself is far more important than trying to prove you’re important. People are attracted to their right attitude more than what they know or how many people they’ve shaken hands with. In fact, they don’t enjoy basking in the attention. The moment they’re praised for an accomplishment, they quickly try to shift the attention to all those who helped them get there. They don’t crave approval or praise because they draw self-worth from within.
7. They don’t make fun of other people
People who put others down are insecure and do so to feel better about themselves and look better in comparison. Confident individuals have an inner strength that they use to support those around them. They don’t feel the need to disregard other people or their views in one matter or another. Instead, they lift others up because they know a lot more is achieved by building one another up than putting each other down. When you’re confident with who you are and what you have to offer the world, you don’t feel the need to make yourself better in front of others. Alright, So, I would like you to do something for me.
8. They don’t entertain negativity
They have a strong support group that reminds them of their best traits and keeps them grounded when things get tough. They don’t spend time with people who belittle them or gossip about others. Instead, they spend time with people who are also positive and optimistic. Letting go of people from our lives is not easy, but sometimes it has to be done so that we improve our attitude towards life.
They also avoid talking negatively about themselves. We all feel a certain way toward ourselves. Sometimes we feel like we’re not good enough, we’ve made a huge mistake or we feel like we’ll fail in some way. And this is the kind of self-talk that confident people avoid. Whenever they feel this way, they stick to the facts. They know their self-worth. They know who they are and what they can accomplish. The self-assured don’t obsess over whether they’re good enough or not. They already know they are. They don’t feel the need to be perfect all the time or stay bummed up whenever they fall short of perfection. When they don’t succeed, they adopt an acceptance and recovery mindset.
9. They don’t play the victim
Confident people focus on the things they can control. They don’t blame others or the world for what happens to them. They prefer to be in control of their own destinies instead of leaving everything unto the universe. Placing blame on others won’t lead to growth or you taking responsibility for your life. A confident person will acknowledge their mistakes and work towards improving themselves, so there isn’t a repeat of what happened. Never will you hear them say that the odds are stacked against them, or everyone’s out to get them. They don’t have time to sulk and play the blame game. They know that they can’t control everything, but the things they can control are what they choose to put all their energy on.
10. They don’t overcompensate to impress
A lot of people tend to buy flashy cars and expensive houses when they reach great heights of success to show everyone just how much wealth they have. And oftentimes, people are impressed with your material possessions and seldom you as a person. Confident people are already comfortable and secure with themselves. There seems to be no need for them to overcompensate. The relationships they form are based on shared histories and fun experiences rather than whether or not you’re driving the latest sports car or wearing the latest in fashion. They feel no need to flaunt their possessions to everyone. They’d rather you be impressed with the kind of person they are.
11. They don’t compare themselves to others
It usually hits you hard when some of your close peers become more successful than you or when a colleague gets promoted and you don’t. But you’ll never find the peace nor the satisfaction you’re searching for if you constantly compare your success with others.
Confident people understand that the only person they need to impress is themselves.
They approach things at their own pace and measure themselves based on the person they were the day before. And instead of being discouraged by the progress of others, they are motivated by it. Comparing yourself to someone else is limiting, and confident people don’t waste time sizing people up and worrying about whether they measure up to everyone they meet or not.
12. They don’t try to be like everyone else
One thing you can say about confident people is that they live authentic lives. And if that means being different from everyone else, then so be it. They would rather stay true to themselves rather than try to be like others. But being able to do this means they know who they are. They don’t try to be someone they’re not and as a result, get the most out of life. In a world full of copycats, confident people choose to be themselves. They don’t conform to other people’s expectations. They stand firm on their own two feet and march to the beat of their own drum. Life is far too valuable to waste it living a life that someone else has chosen.
13. They aren’t afraid to ask for help
They know that asking someone else for help won’t make them any less strong or intelligent. They know what their strengths and weaknesses are, and they seek assistance in areas they’re not especially good at. By learning from someone with far more expertise, they improve themselves immensely.
The main reason why a lot of people are afraid to ask for help is that they’re afraid of what other people might think of them. They don’t want to ask what some may consider a dumb question or something they should know already. Confident people, on the other hand, aren’t afraid to ask for assistance. After all, everyone needs help at some point.
14. They don’t need anyone’s permission to act
They don’t need anybody telling them what to do or when to do it. They don’t waste time asking pointless questions like, can I really do it? Should I? What they ask themselves instead is, why not? Why shouldn’t I? From presiding over a meeting when the chair doesn’t show up or going out of their way to solve a customer’s problem, it doesn’t register with them that they need to wait for someone else to handle it. They see what needs to be done, and they do it.
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